In isolation do I enjoy my life
Even in the company of my closest acquaintances (friends, if they allow me to use that term) I feel removed, distant. No, I do NOT mean I consider myself beyond them. Maybe the Almighty, if He exists, forgot to input the code for gregariousness – organized or otherwise, that defines a human being – into me. Or maybe he messed it up (as is usually the case) and cast an alien into human mold.

In isolation do I enjoy ecstasy and despair
The weirdest part is, I’d really love to be a part of the society, a face among many others. Yet I feel absolutely no inclination to break out of the web of loneliness I’ve woven around me. With my friends, you’d probably see me as another normal teenager indulging in an excited chatter. If only you had known with what effort I maintain even that simple conversation, say, about girls, with anyone. Or even retain that tone of excitement in my voice.

Sometimes I long to be ordinary…
…Just another brick in the wall…
…Just another particle of sand in the desert of humanity…
…Just another insignificant figure in the milling crowd…
It may seem strange, but sometimes I wish to surrender myself to mediocrity just in order to be a part, an inconspicuous perhaps, but integral part of society.

But why should I?
I AM extraordinary. I know it. I am endowed with talents and opportunities many people would gladly die for. And no amount of persuasion or failure can convince me that this notion of mine is an erratic one. I am proud to be what I am…

…though, perhaps, it would have been better if I hadn’t been…

…perhaps, it would have been better if I hadn’t existed at all…

…maybe, I do not exist at all….

…maybe, this is all a dream…

…maybe, this is all a beautiful nightmare…

…but then, who is dreaming the dream?

Nah, enough of worthless pseudophilosophical talk;
I articulate in existence,
How dare I articulate against existence?

P.S.: If all of this makes no sense to you, it is probably because it makes no sense at all, even to me.

Sorry for wasting your time, folks.

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